Vulvectomy – Putrescent Clitoral Fermentation

This is without a doubt some of the dumbest music I’ve ever heard.  Vulvectomy is the Paris Hilton of slam death: they’re setting everyone back ten years in progress.  This is the most archtypical slam I can think of; really the sort of thing you hear in your mind when you think of ‘slam death’.  Totally deemphasized blasting sections, massively thick guitar tone, song structures ENTIRELY based around slam riffs, and just about every other typical slam element you can possibly think of.  The only thing to slightly set Vulvectomy apart is the presence of a drum machine… which is programmed exactly like any slam death drummer anyway.  They’ve even used slammy samples for each of the drum voices!

All the music here is very typical Devourment/Cephalotripsy/etc. worship, but it’s made even more binary than any of those bands.  There’s nothing in the way of ‘evolving’ song structures: they just barrel in a totally straight line down these simple tremolo/chunk riffs.  Growly gurgles and an oppressively heavy production job do that much more to reduce any concept of ‘variation’ to somewhere around zero.  While listening to ‘Putrescent Clitoral Fermentation’ you get the impression that the guys in Vulvectomy are slam fans and slam fans only; it’s like they haven’t heard even a trace of any other style of music or metal, for that matter.  It’s the distilled essence of the genre into a single album; I guess that’s what happens when you start making things within the paradigm of a genre intentionally.

For instance, you notice how all the earliest funeral doom bands like Skepticism and Thergothon don’t really sound much at all like the typical funeral doom band today?  Well the same thing essentially happened with slam.  Devourment and Soils Of Fate don’t sound a great deal like Vulvectomy, because slam, like funeral doom, sort of decided for itself what the ‘ground floor’ of the genre would be.  Well Vulvectomy isn’t just hugging the ground floor, they actually have a shovel and are digging a hole in it in hopes of getting lower.  This music is the anti-Amputated Genitals or Septycal Gorge; other bands are trying to push slam death forward, but Vulvectomy are reveling in every ounce of absolute regression they’re able to summon up.

It’s helpful, though, that the guys in Vulvectomy really understand how to make good, painfully straightforward slam death.  They’ve done their homework on how to compose a massive slam section, and some of the tremolo riffs actually aren’t boring (the typical pitfall of most slam bands).  The drum programming is deft and feels natural (apart from the absence of fills) and allows for very natural transitions between blast and groove.  While the seams of songwriting between fast and slow are still visible, they’re not really awkwardly or thoughtlessly done; the music on this album has a feeling of fine-tuning over a pretty significant period of time.  The opposite of, I don’t know, Artery Eruption in that respect.  Vulvectomy gets stoned AFTER the writing instead of before, I guess.

So while it operates TOTALLY within the traditions of the genre, I really do love this album.  It’s enormously catchy, fantastic driving music, and skull-crushingly heavy slam death for big fans of the style like myself.  This will NOT change the minds of anyone who hates Devourment; this is pure Italian thug slam that’s only missing a sideways baseball cap and some lyrics about (non-eviscerated) hoes before it’s rap music with heavy guitars.  If you love slam, there’s no reason you shouldn’t own this already!  Invent a slam right now, and it’s in this album: CHUNCHUNCHUN CHUN, CHUN-CHUN, CHUN-CHUN, CHUN CHUN!  It’s fun!  Start your day the slammy way with Vulvectomy!


~ by noktorn on May 6, 2008.

One Response to “Vulvectomy – Putrescent Clitoral Fermentation”

  1. Vulvectomy fucken rock, man!

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